Adoption at its finest

This family is amazing!

Fathers: Earthly Father, Heavenly Father

I am so grateful for Fathers and their influence in the world. I'm grateful for the way the emulate our Heavenly Father.

The Power of Mothers: You Never Know

We watched this video in one of my classes and I think it pays tribute to mothers everywhere. Thanks for all the work you do for the WORLD!

Dating!

Dr. John Van Epp has established the “Know-Quo.” Based on his research, this means to get to know someone, there are three things you must do. You must establish togetherness, time, and talk. Togetherness means participating in a variety of activities with one another to see how you and the one you are dating act in different situations. Time means spending time with someone for at least three months. Talk means to mutually disclose information about one’s self; sharing your hopes and dreams, your fears and worries. The science echoes the words of Elder Oaks, “There should be dating, followed by careful and thoughtful and thorough courtship. There should be ample opportunities to experience the prospective spouse’s behavior in a variety of circumstances. Fiancés should learn everything they can about the families with whom they will soon be joined in marriage. In all of this, we should realize that a good marriage does not require a perfect man or a perfect woman. It only requires a man and a woman committed to strive together toward perfection.”

Elder Oaks also has defined what a date is. He said, “[a date] is planned, paid for, and paired off.” These three “p’s” of dating correlate with the Proclamation’s three “p’s,” which are preside, provide, and protect. When a man demonstrates he can preside, by planning a date, provide, by paying for the date, and protect, by being paired off for the length of date, it shows that he is well on his way to preparing to be a father and a husband. And as a woman helps the man in dating, she is preparing to be a nurturer as she nurtures their relationship.

I am grateful for my husband and I's dating experience. I am grateful that we have the opportunity to be sealed for time and all eternity. I am grateful that we have eternity to get to know each other and become more perfect each day.

Gender and Same-sex Attraction

In the The Family: A Proclamation to the World we learn, "Gender is an essential characteristic of individual premortal, mortal, and eternal identity and purpose." In class we learned about the differences of men and women. Men are task oriented and spacial oriented. Women are able to focus on lots of things at once and relationship centered.  Even when boys and girls are just a few days old, girls tend to move their mouths more. Girls also have five times as much connective tissue connecting the emotion and communication centers in their brains then boys do. I think these are important differences that are divinely given. Elder Bednar, an apostle of the Lord, has said, "For divine purposes, male and female spirits are different, distinctive, and complementary. The unique combination of spiritual, physical, mental, and emotional capacities of both males and females were needed to implement the plan of happiness. Alone, neither the man nor the woman could fulfill the purposes of his or her creation. The man perfects the woman and the woman perfects the man." The Proclamation states that men are to preside, provide, and protect their families and women are to nurture their families. I think men and women are different to help provide these different needs for families.

In class we also discussed same-sex attraction. From the research we studied, there isn't any good and valid studies that support the biological argument that gays are born that way. A. Dean Byrd, a professor and researcher with a Ph.D., M.B.A., and M.P.H., says, "The most likely explanation of homosexuality is that it results from a complex combination of biological factors (such as temperament), environmental traumas (such as trauma associated with sexual or peer abuse), and difficult parental relationships, all of which vary with the individual. And in considering these explanations, one must not exclude the role of agency or choice in response to such attractions." Elder Oaks has said, "homosexual feelings are controllable. Feelings can be controlled and behavior can be controlled. The line of sin is between the feelings and the behavior. It's no sin to have inclinations that if yielded to would produce behavior that would be a transgression. The sin is in yielding to the temptation."Elder Wickman said, "we can control how we behave, and it is behavior which is important." "same-gender attraction did not exist in the pre-earth life and neither will it exist in the next life. it is a circumstance that for whatever reason or reasons seems to apply right now in mortality, in this nano-second of our eternal existence."
This is a link to the Church's website that has lots of good information and videos about how the church feels about same-sex attraction!
Mormons and Gays


I am so grateful that I have been sealed to my amazing husband. I am so grateful that we are different and that we each have our different abilities and talents. And I'm grateful that we bring the best out of each other. I love him with all my heart!

Social Class, Culture, and the Lord's Way

Every family is in a social class and each family has a unique culture. But regardless of what your situation and circumstances are, you can make your family function happily. God loves each one of his children which is everyone on earth.  He doesn’t care if you are rich or poor, educated or not, how fancy you dress or who you know. He wants each of us to be happy, keep his commandments and return to live with Him again. The Family a Proclamation to the World states, “Happiness in family life is most likely to be achieved when founded upon the teachings of the Lord Jesus Christ. Successful marriages and families are established and maintained on principles of faith, prayer, repentance, forgiveness, respect, love, compassion, work, and wholesome recreational activities.” I know that families who base their families on these teachings will be blessed and happy.

This week we learned about theories that are related to the family structure and happenings. These theories aren't truths, but you can see their place in different family situations. Here's a quick run down on the theories.

• Systems Theory: The sum is greater than the whole. The family as a whole is more important than individuals in the family
• Exchange Theory: Getting your costs lower than your rewards. You're always making sure you're getting what you need out of a interaction, without giving too much
• Symbolic Interaction Theory: What happens in an interaction is a result of what the individuals brought and the interaction itself. So even if your mind is set on a path, your interactions might change your thoughts about something.
• Conflict Theory: There is always inequality in a relationship, and whoever has more resources is most likely to get what they want.

Here's some examples in my life of some of these theories. 

• Symbolic Interaction Theory: When I graduated from high school my plan was to go to BYU and then in a few years be married at age 21. A month after graduation I met my future husband and we were married less than a year later. And I couldn't be HAPPIER with the way it all turned out!
  
• Systems Theory: I grew up as the second of 9 children. There was lots of times when you had to put the needs of the family above your own. There was certain things that all family members were required to attend. These consisted of family prayers, family scripture study, family dinners and breakfasts, family councils, family reunions, siblings sport games and dance recitals, and family home evenings. There was many times when it would have been more convenient to do what I needed to do instead of participating in the family activities, but I am grateful for the times I did put my family before myself.