Dating!

Dr. John Van Epp has established the “Know-Quo.” Based on his research, this means to get to know someone, there are three things you must do. You must establish togetherness, time, and talk. Togetherness means participating in a variety of activities with one another to see how you and the one you are dating act in different situations. Time means spending time with someone for at least three months. Talk means to mutually disclose information about one’s self; sharing your hopes and dreams, your fears and worries. The science echoes the words of Elder Oaks, “There should be dating, followed by careful and thoughtful and thorough courtship. There should be ample opportunities to experience the prospective spouse’s behavior in a variety of circumstances. Fiancés should learn everything they can about the families with whom they will soon be joined in marriage. In all of this, we should realize that a good marriage does not require a perfect man or a perfect woman. It only requires a man and a woman committed to strive together toward perfection.”

Elder Oaks also has defined what a date is. He said, “[a date] is planned, paid for, and paired off.” These three “p’s” of dating correlate with the Proclamation’s three “p’s,” which are preside, provide, and protect. When a man demonstrates he can preside, by planning a date, provide, by paying for the date, and protect, by being paired off for the length of date, it shows that he is well on his way to preparing to be a father and a husband. And as a woman helps the man in dating, she is preparing to be a nurturer as she nurtures their relationship.

I am grateful for my husband and I's dating experience. I am grateful that we have the opportunity to be sealed for time and all eternity. I am grateful that we have eternity to get to know each other and become more perfect each day.